Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
