the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Blow job season was short but glorious.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
