Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
he laminated a picture of his dick.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Dear god my vagina.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
