I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
