just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
