If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
