My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
