Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
