You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
