Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I would fuck him just for his dog
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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