He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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