All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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