how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
