This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
