apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
