"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Randomize