arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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