Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
