yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
