somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
