I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
