I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
why do cheetos always look like penises
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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