We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
