How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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