What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
