it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Randomize
