Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
