I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
