dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
He is an equal opportunity slut.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Randomize
