When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
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