Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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