i may or may not be watching the land before time
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
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