We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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