Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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