I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
