My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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