What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
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