Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
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