so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Randomize
