P.S. I can't hear my feet
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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