coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I believe in your delicious
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
