Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
