it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Randomize
