so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
nutella sex= disaster
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
My vagina just clenched in fear
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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