Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
