ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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