K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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