my sisters under your porch take her home
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
