Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
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