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Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
accomplished twins. life is a go
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize