Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize