I wish I could punch you in the face.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Randomize
