I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize